Let’s Get Interesting

Let me tell you about the night I met the man that I am madly in love with.

I met his “friend” on a stupid dating website, right? Got invited to a party, which yes drugs and alcohol were involved. Honestly, thats probably the only reason I wanted to go.

So, his “friend” told me to meet him at this house, as i did, but parents and such, so we all ended up meeting at a park.

I met this handsome and very well mannered 19 year old with long black hair. He seemed very friendly and quite apathetic. Since the party was a bust we all ended up going to said “friends” house. All night while I was getting high, and very drunk, I seemed to be having a great time with the well mannered 19 year old.

We ended up going to the neighbors house (Adam). now the mysterious man with long black hair (Jesse) invited me over there with him. I ended up sitting behind him and he accidentally elbowed me in the mouth.

Now, as any woman who wanted to kiss the man who just elbowed her in the mouth, i said, “well, aren’t you going to kiss it better?” he leaned in and gave me the best kiss I’ve ever had.

I went to go find a trash can and Jesse followed me. I’m telling you this has never happened to me before. I turned around and kissed him, we made out in that kitchen for a good amount of time.

To Be Continued….

The redhead with daddy issues

I wasn’t always a redhead, and I didn’t always have daddy issues.

It all started at 5 years old, when my hair was not so red. I was innocently sleeping upstairs, while my father was, well… not so innocently cooking meth in the family kitchen.

Now as an 18 year old, with a fiancee and almost a family, I realize that my father had issues too.. His were just a bit more intoxicating than my own. As far as you all know..

Project Unbreakable

It was about 6 years old, my mom was asleep in the room across the hall,
my sisters out with friends and my brother asleep on the couch downstairs
a man who wore a mask and black clothing came into the house
i was sleeping in my nightgown on the bottom bunk of the bunkbed
the bunkbed that me and my brother shared, again sleeping downstairs
this man came into my room and he said to me
“you say a word and i will shoot you right now”
i stayed quite while he took off all of my clothing and proceeded to touch me
a little after he put something inside of me, i did not know it at the time
he slid his pxnis inside of my six year old vxgina
as much as it hurt i stayed quiet, i was not going to die that night
he kept thrusting himself deeper and deeper
the tears fell and then he stopped finally he had stopped
He put the gun up to my head and said
“if you tell anyone i will find out and i WILL come back and kill you”
I watched in horror through my window as he drove away on a motorcycle
A few nights after my sister was bringing me to bed and i said
“no im too scared please don’t make me”
I told her everything, she told me it was just a bad dream
she said something to my mom and neither believed me,
i know it wasn’t a dream, and it wasnt a nightmare
it was very real, so very… REAL
I AM unbreakable, I AM strong

missing

Sometimes, life gets ahead of you
all you think is “how the hell did i get here?”
you make promises you will never keep
campaign for things you don’t believe in
and ignore the people who love you the most
maybe we should be willing to love one another
instead of watching people get hurt
i wish for a missing child to see their mother once more
i hope that those girls walking home from school
don’t take the shortcut into a dark alleyway
i pray that men learn how to treat a woman
like the princesses they are
moral of the story, protect the ones you love the most
and look out for the ones you don’t even know

Untitled

If only you knew how i felt you would love me the same,

maybe we would even be within the same realm of heart…

but you who failed to gain me back lost what you cared most about.

You loving me was just a fantasy that could never come true,

if you really loved me you would be here,

being somebody I could look up to….

being the father i never had,

knowing you chose something over me is like somebody ripping my heart out and squeezing it until it stopped beating

you had the choice..

me, your daughter or your precious drugs.